Matsuda Gone Wild
by Sashocirrione
Summary: Matsuda has heard that a certain ritual is required in certain circumstances, but is he right or wrong? Only L knows for sure.


**Title: **"Matsuda Gone Wild"

**Author: **Sashocirrione

**Spoilers: **MAJOR Spoilers for everything up to the "chained together" time.

**Warnings: **Rated T for mild sexual themes.

**Summary: **Matsuda has heard that a certain ritual is required in certain circumstances, but is he right or wrong? Only L knows for sure.

**Pairings: **Extremely slight LightxMatsuda and LxLight.

**Additional Notes: **All canon events previous to this have occurred as normal.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Death Note, and I do not make any money from these writings.

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_Swinging. Swinging. It's all swinging down there._

Light tried to pull his thoughts together, but for a genius, he was surprisingly unable to think, until L's words broke him out of his trance.

"Matsuda, where are your clothes?"

Matsuda casually replied, "In my room of course. Wheeeeee! Isn't this fun!"

Matsuda was walking around unashamed, completely naked, his penis and balls swinging underneath him with every step, holding a file folder under one arm as he approached the little knot the other investigators had made around Watari's coffee-and-doughnuts cart. There was a stunned silence.

Light knew his face was already red, and he was about to look aroused if he didn't do something _right this second_, so he tried very hard to plaster on a disapproving expression. No, nothing but disgust here. Light rolled his eyes sarcastically to add to the effect.

It was bad enough being gay for the detective he was chained to, when he couldn't possibly do anything about it. He didn't need a random attraction to Matsuda to add to the already-existing mess. Matsuda was quite obviously attracted to girls, a complete heterosexual. L was a mystery in the sexual department, an enigma, but that wasn't the real problem.

The real problem was that L thought Light was Kira. Light had resolved that, until L proved his innocence, he wouldn't make any moves on the detective. It would be too easy for L to see such things as manipulative instead of genuine, and that would taint their entire relationship. No, Light needed to wait. But looking at an attractive male body didn't help matters any. Light's brain was descending to his groin.

L said, "Matsuda, is there a reason for your actions?"

"Well, my friends told me, whenever there is an all-male workplace, someone has to do this at least once. And Misa-Misa can't even leave her suite unless I unlock it for her, so she'll never see and she doesn't actually work here anyway."

Aizawa said, "My friends told me that too, but I stopped believing them when I was fifteen."

Matsuda's face looked incredibly hurt, and Light wanted to go over there and comfort him; put his arms around Matsuda and tell him everything was fine.

_Wait! No! Not this image! Not me hugging a nude Matsuda!_

It was too late. Light already had an erection. He pulled his knees up into an L-like position, crouching on his chair. This way, his legs fully hid his erection. L gave him a quizzical glance.

Matsuda used the file folder to hide his crotch and said, "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I'm always doing everything wrong!"

Light couldn't stand it any more. He said, "Matsuda, Aizawa was just kidding. Everyone knows there's a rule like that about all-male workplaces. Everyone has friends who say that. Isn't that right, Riyuzaki?"

L said, "I wouldn't know, since I've never had friends, but it seems logical. Other all-male environments allow nudity. Okay, let's do this properly. It'll be a naked workplace until it's time to let Misa-Misa out."

Light couldn't believe his ears. Was this a trick, or was L really that socially clueless? But, the men all around him were stripping. Light joined them, using the chair and the action of turning his back to hide his erection as he undressed, then quickly re-assuming the same L-like posture as before. When everyone was done and settled down, L went back to typing away at his computer as if nothing had happened.

After a few minutes, L glanced over at Light and said, "I see you've begun sitting normally."

Light replied, "I've found it does help my thinking."

As Light tried not to survey the sheer mass of naked male flesh presented before him, two individuals of which were young and attractive, he thought:

_It does. It really, really does._

_

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**A/N (Author's Note):**

Well, did L really believe Light, or was he just messing with him? I guess the reader decides.

Another one-shot inspired by a request on the death note kink meme on livejournal.

This was written because I need a break sometimes from all the serious stuff, and then I just need to let loose with goofy fics so I can rest a bit and then afterwards reapply myself to the serious works.


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